I Don’t Know What Odds Are

Kathryn painting.

I’m making a 8′ x 12′ mural at the Grant Grover School, a branch of the College of Marin, for young people with special needs, through the Youth in Arts program of Marin County. When I say I don’t know what odds are, what I mean is that many odds pale when I spend time with someone who cannot walk or talk, but who can look me in the eye and cause me to question all I take for granted. As Lili Lopez, my 18 year-old Unity Through Creativity assistant, says “They know something we don’t know.” The students at Grant Grover have a great range of skill and consciousness, which makes any skill and consciousness seem like a precious thing. Every time I ask a student to use a chalk line, or take a video, or use a caulk gun, I never know what will happen. Most of my requests have been met with “yes” and follow through.

After surveying 30 students about their sparks, I made a sketch incorporating many of their passions. I chose the golden retriever as a symbol of unconditional love. One of the students has a dream of making a shelter for abused and neglected golden retrievers. He sees the odds that the dogs are up against and wants to do something about it. I xeroxed the drawing and asked the students to color it in, getting ideas for the color scheme.

I’m comfortable around these young people because I can relate to the level of affection they thrive on.  It reminds me of Eat, Pray, Love author Elizabeth Gilbert’s description of herself as a cross between a golden retriever and a barnacle.  I told that to Kyle, the prince of warmth at the school – the golden retriever guy.  We had a belly laugh about how that’s how much we need love, too.

Below you’ll see pictures of the mural in progress. The will and fortitude of these young people, their teachers and their families is inspiring.

Study for “We Must Care for the Earth”

Sealing moisture out.

Preparing the support structure.

Coloring the studies to get ideas for our color scheme.

Walter helped to make the master grid for the three panels so we could transfer the drawing.

Tyler, Lili and Shayla painting Mt. Tamalpais

Giving Attention to the Behavior We Want

How do we beat the odds of negativity that we are up against? Like any sane parent and educator knows, focusing on positive behavior gets you more of it. So I want to praise a family that I consider to be much more deserving of attention than Charlie Sheen. The Medlock family in Colorado Springs should be headline news. This family has chosen to adopt five sisters in the foster care system while having raised six children of their own. They are doing the daily discipline of love, plaiting hair, providing favorite color butterfly clips and glasses, making breakfasts and helping with homework. The sparks of Shakira, Bryanne, Bryonna, Bryann, and Bryla are being nourished in their new home, where they’ve lived for a year. The Medlock’s son, Steve, who attends Afterschool University, said “I want to be the one who saves the day.” The model of this family’s generosity will save the day.

Soul as Fundamental to Beating the Odds

This is the story that I told a mother and her three daughters at the Afterschool University in Colorado Springs, causing me to burst into tears. The first person who was killed by Seung-Hui Cho at Virginia Tech in 2007 was my former art student, 19 year-old Emily Hilscher. I had taught her numerous summers beginning when she was eight. Everything she touched was rooted in nature, whimsey and affection. She was studying to be a vet. After the massacre at Virginia Tech, I flew to Emily’s funeral in Rappahannock County, VA, a close-knit community of 7000, where I had lived for 27 years. The high school’s highway sign read “We love you, Emily”. That’s where the funeral was held – behind the school, outside in the track field. At the end of the ceremony, white doves were released against the fresh blue April sky. In the height of painful sorrow at this senseless loss, not one word was said against Cho. Those who attended the funeral focused on the fact that he was a severely damaged person.

When I returned to California I had a dream about Cho. He was eight – the same age as Emily was when I first met her. He was furious. He kicked me in the stomach, twisted both of my nipples and sent a sickly yellow green light from his eyes to my eyes. As the light entered my eyes, I felt my body change. I looked into a mirror and saw that I had become Asian. I was aware that even though I had a different body, my soul had remained the same. It was the clearest experience I ever had of my soul as a distinct entity. Cho, looked at me with tears running down his enraged face and said, “I had a soul and no one saw it.”

The philospher, Rudolph Steiner, said that terrible blood letting of the 20th century was a result of the fact that people couldn’t express their souls. Now in the 21st century, facing the challenges of our over-populated, over-stimulating and dangerous times, I pray that we see the fundamental importance of each human being’s inner sacredness.